KWL embarks on weekend of wiffles. PDF Print E-mail
Written by Ryan Winfield   
Thursday, 12 July 2012 12:28
KWL embarks on weekend of wiffles! by Ryan Winfield

When you find yourself in the open fields and farmlands of Ohio, and you hear a plastic on plastic “thwack,” you know you’ve stumbled upon a little piece of wiffle heaven.
Long known for the national London Wiffleball tournament (14 years running as of this year,) Ohio is increasing its reputation as a wiffle mecca by expanding its reach to Columbus, which will be home to the newly created National Wiffle League Association tournament. This fresh competitive creation was born from the idea that people love the camaraderie and the road trip that London brought, but the slow pitch rules left something to be desired for the fast pitch wiffler. Leaders from the Potomac, Kalamazoo and Wiffle in Southeast Michigan leagues, along with wiffle savant Josh Smith, came together over a love of the game to form a tournament for these players.

Commissioner Chris Gallaway (you may remember him from the “Scared Hitless v. Scared Hitless” scrum from a few years back) set aside his deep running hatred for the KWL and took on a large leadership role in bringing this tournament to life. By scouting locations and negotiating shady, back alley deals to secure the proper accommodations, he determined that Columbus was the best site for this new tournament.
Next up for the KWL – assembling a crack team of players to claim Kalamazoo the title of “Best Wiffle League” in the country. Brian Lewis was charged with recruiting a balanced team of pitchers and hitters, and one would have a hard time arguing with his decisions. You may notice that the team has a real Scared Hitless flavor to it; that was by design. During these tournaments, you are often in cramped quarters and long car rides. Lewis decided that the strong team bond build over the last 3 years would translate well to a scenario such as this.

Taking the mound during this tournament will be David Ayres (Scared Hitless), a relative newcomer who has been flat out dominant at times this season, and Zac Adams (Industrials), the floppy haired heartthrob with the nastiest screwball in the league. This left one vital pitching spot left. After being threatened by Lewis with employment termination, reigning MVP and 2012 Cy Wiffle front runner Adam Kuzmin joined the dream team. Averaging less than 1 hit per game allowed, this will truly be Kuzmin’s national coming out party.
You’ll also find captain ginger Brian Lewis (Scared Hitless) in the lineup, although pitching might be scarce for him, unless the wind is blowing in – very, very, very hard. Angry man and clutch hit extraordinaire Mark Thomson (Scared Hitless) will also add some punch. But if The Hitless has been lacking of anything this year, it has been offense. That’s where Kevin Marszalek (Friars) comes in. “The Icon” is one of the top hitters our league has ever seen, and his ability to read a pitcher and communicate his information with teammates will be invaluable during the tourney. His cheerful demeanor and his claim that “all the beer is on me” definitely didn’t hurt, either.

The Kalamazoo Kings will try and recapture the tournament darling status from last year in London on July 14th; your fearless KWL representative for the NWLA tournament, the “Kalamazoo Aces,” will be setting off for Ohio on Friday the 13th, and if you believe in superstition, it will be a bloodbath for all other teams involved in this tournament. Follow results at and cheer on your Kalamazoo team from home.

Last Updated on Friday, 31 August 2012 12:22
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